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Blood, Sweat, and Fiends: A Fort Fourth!


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Maybe just a little. I need to set up another account just for TRs It may seem that way, but just because I was on the thread doesn't mean I was reading it. Nice detective work MD and nice job on the

Clairvoyance, it's a gift.

That’s the same expression I have on my face when starting a trip to the Fort. Enjoying the Trip Report. :)

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Love the beer selections. I prefer Porters to milk stouts, but you had a great varity. I agree the Terapin must have chocolate in it. That was a one and done beer for me. Love Murphy's. Once again, need to find that Left Hand Beer.

But my main question is:

Where the Fort did you find those spicy pickles? WHERE?

Clausen is the closest brand I can find that reminds me of the pickles they use to sell at the Fort. I remember as a kid, we would head to the Settlement and get one from a big barrel and then watch EWP. Then over time the barrel disapeared but they had them in the deli. Then the deli went and so did the pickles....BOO FLIPPIN BOO!

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Day Four:

Music: Beachfront Serenade and Poolside Jam

Drink: Fruity Tourist Drinks and barrel scrapings

Smell: Chlorine and Band-Aids

And it goes a little something like this…

Last full day of the trip, but we had tons of stuff to do.

We were all up early.

While the crew scattered and stumbled about, I hopped on Ben’s cart with him to go get the day started the right way.

Pffsstt!

Diet Dr. Pepper… I was ready.

Who needs coffee?

Ben does, and MetalWife does. So off to the little Inn on the Lake.

Via the super secret spot…

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I realized I have never just taken pictures of stuff around the Settlement before, so today, I was on it!

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I saw this… I get it!

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Earlier, when I took my son to get his Fort shirt, we had a spoof argument.

My son had a dollar in his pocket, and MetalWife said there was nothing at Disney you could buy for a dollar.

I was out to prove her wrong…genius move for any husband…NOT!

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She was partially right. I haven’t owned a dollar in coins since ‘round about 1997 or so.

Onward and upward. Actually inward. Here’s Ben and two random dudes filling up their fix.

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That Trail’s End AC is freaking cold in the morning. Look how it fogged up my phone!

I pushed my way in eventually to mix up a batch for MetalWife.

Dr. Pepper was still holding down the cart in the lot.

Back to the site, breakfast was a mish-mash of leftovers. Some random eggs, sausage, and anything else we needed to get rid of.

No one ate much, just enough to take the edge off.

I walked around the back of the site to snap some more shots.

Looking down the tracks…if they were still there.

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A shot of the site. I used this shot earlier in the TR to show the site, but I’m putting it back here so it’s in sequence.

And, as a gesture of courtesy so you don’t have to search for it!

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Everyone ska-daddled again.

Ben was going to go fishing and William was going with him.

Somehow, Gracie joined the expedition.

I have a fishing pole too. A really cool black and blue one.

It’s travelled back and forth to the Fort four times now. It’s been in the water once!

Here’s Gracie and William waiting for Ben.

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Notice the gun-rack-style array of hardware strapped to the roof of that thing.

The pink one is Gracie’s “Lady Fish” rod. She does amazing work with it.

Directly across from us was this woman.

I wasn’t really going for a butt-shot, but it gives the shot character.

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I helped her pack up just a bit before this shot.

She said it was her first time out with the camper, and wasn’t thrilled with the amount of work to set-up and break-down camp.

She was gonna give it another trip before she decides whether to keep it or move-up.

I explained that I’m office-bound all-week and that the physical part of set-up is a bit cathartic for me.

She said I was dumb, proceeded to beat me up, and take my pocket money.

I made that part up, it seemed funny when I typed it. I didn’t have any pocket money.

It was time for an adventure. Just me and the two littlest ones.

MetalWife stayed behind to work on school planning.

She says anyone that thinks teachers don’t do anything all summer can…

I told her there’s a filter on the website that wouldn’t let that word publish.

So, off we go a Fortin’ around.

The guy in the last spot of the loop had this really cool vintage popup camper.

The roof was light blue, like a pool, and popped up one side at a time.

And the box had a really cool parallelogram lean to it.

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His mode of transport around the campground was this amazing old-school Schwinn, which you can see beyond my mirror.

He was man enough to ride a girl’s bike, and no one said nothing, but “cool bike”!

He pulled his aged PUP with an old wood-paneled station wagon.

Which, come to think of it, is probably why I referenced the Brady Bunch earlier herein.

I wanna be him when I grow up.

As we went past I yelled “It’s a classic!”

And, just like my 84 year-old Dad, that’s deaf in one ear, he yelled back… “Wha?”.

I waved and went on.

We looped a bit.

Looking out for new details yet to be savored.

Nooks and crannies that we had passed-over or never slowed down enough to enjoy.

And since we didn’t have Josie with us, we wanted to plan some adventures for when she came with us next time.

We found something on, I think the 700 loop.

We’d not had reason to look in the past, but we found a dog walk that I’m sure you all know.

But we didn’t, so there!

We decided to investigate.

We found more FWRR remnants.

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The kids were elated, and I’m feeling all Indiana Jones.

We found the dog area, well shaded and meadow-like, with a beautiful funky green canal lining it.

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We threw some rocks and talked about running around with our dog in this new spot that no one ever heard of… except you...

and the 4 or 5 people that brought their dogs there while we were there...

and perhaps the rest of the people that were in the dog loop.

Maybe a couple of others, but that’s it!

We headed back up to the Settlement to celebrate our new find.

This is a cool spot, too bad it’s not really used for more than walking across to the marina from cart parking.

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I think it would make a cool sand-floored café-type of deal.

Like extending where the tables with the umbrellas are.

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The next shot is obviously the side of the trading post.

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It didn’t come out like I wanted.

If it had, you'd see that there are two ladders that are maybe 4-6 feet tall hung on the side of the building.

They hung at a height of maybe 18 feet off the ground. I thought… If you have a ladder tall enough to reach those two ladders, why would you need them?

I like this shot. Not bad for a phone!

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Into the trading post, to get our explorer’s reward.

Wait, but first look at this!

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We were gonna toast like conquistadors!

With chocolate milk!

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We pulled into that little section of road that leads to Clementine’s Beach.

Parked right at the edge before it turns to sand.

We toasted and drank our chocolate milk.

Except for Annie, she had strawberry.

I let them take some photos.

Annie’s work…

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And Johnny’s...

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We had a ball together.

Fortunately, my kids are still young enough that they are influenced by my taste.

They like the Punch Brothers too!

Accordingly, we sat in that cart, staring at Bay Lake like we were at the drive-in singing at the top of our lungs.

Here’s what we were singing:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uJDSvGN9Ph4

Next, we decided to sneak out to the special secret spot.

Interlopers.

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Gracie rocking the Lady Fish

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Look how Ben uses that Kenny Cart like a center-console fishing boat!

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William pulled in another nice sized one.

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Notice all the fathers and their kids in the background.

This is a big reason the Fort is so special to us, and why we’re content with a park-less trip.

Some more shots of Ben’s bountiful catch.

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So far so good. A good morning!

See you back at the camper… it’s lunchtime!

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What a nice surprise to log in this morning and find a MD update!

Great and funny as always.

I promise not to tell anyone about you getting beaten up by an old lady or the secret dog walk area. ;)

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What a nice surprise to log in this morning and find a MD update!

Yeah what Stef said. Sad to see it is nearing the end, but it looks like a great time. Good job with the fish. Not a teacher but I tell people that complain about teachers that if it is so easy why aren't they doing it (instead of complaining).

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What a nice surprise to log in this morning and find a MD update!

Great and funny as always.

I promise not to tell anyone about you getting beaten up by an old lady or the secret dog walk area. ;)

Thanks! I can't wait to bring Josie up there. And if I see that lady again...I'll exact my revenge!!!

Yeah what Stef said. Sad to see it is nearing the end, but it looks like a great time. Good job with the fish. Not a teacher but I tell people that complain about teachers that if it is so easy why aren't they doing it (instead of complaining).

Amen! There's still a bit left to the TR. Two more excursions. Plus a bonus round of "going home" photos!

AGU MD!

Loved the photo of the secret spot, and I really loved the photo of the sunbeams streaming down on Ben's cart by the canal!

TCD

Thanks! That is a cool shot.

Actually that whole morning run was memorable. I think the chocolate milk on the beach is a great start and should be a staple of the schedule for us moving forward.

Whoohooo, a MD update!

But no beer?

Oh, ye of little faith. Wait until you see the next BTS!

there is a new secret place to check out.... loving the pics.

Shhh...it's a secret.

Thanks, I was especially please with the pics on this trip. Especially the varying degrees of quality and absurdity!

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Punch Brothers! No, I don't have the newest album. I think I need to fix that.

Except for the Punch Brothers, I guess it's not that bad a TR.

Don't let that go to your head though, I scrolled by most of it.

Annie loves that song, as it's about a doll...sort of. It's absolutely my favorite record of the year for 2012!

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MD, when I/we go Fortin' again, I'm gonna let you ghost write my TR. And how 'bout that sunshine pic at the fishin' hole? Wow, that has a "Heart of Jesus" glow to it, doesn't it? Thanks for including the fish pics. Those were some beautiful bluegills that the kids caught. Will's bass was a little over a pound. That last bass I got behind the site was over 2 pounds. I should have put my Sam Adams next to it to give some perspective, since no one was there to share my conquest. Oh, and the lady that opened up a can of whoop-ass on you, she's the one who called the popo on the site with the non-approved fire pit that appeared to be in the middle of some "let's see how high these flames will go" contest. As always, excellent update!!

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That's right. I forgot about that.

Some tent campers had a fire that made even me go "damn, that's a dangerous fire".

It was big and crackly, and smelled of pine, I'm sure they were burning lumber. I was between angry, annoyed, and jealous.

It was still going the next morning whilst everyone was still sleeping, my son pointed that out!

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That's right. I forgot about that.

Some tent campers had a fire that made even me go "damn, that's a dangerous fire".

It was big and crackly, and smelled of pine, I'm sure they were burning lumber. I was between angry, annoyed, and jealous.

It was still going the next morning whilst everyone was still sleeping, my son pointed that out!

Oh the stories I could tell about campfires. For instance, our new neighbors could be nominees for the TCD People of Genius (don't know if it was man or women) Award. The picked up a stump... not a a few branches, a stump, put it over as it would not go in their fire ring, then lit it. Did I mention it has been raining off and on for a week. The smoke was thicker than the fog. They then left it to go to the other side of their lot.... Genius at Work! :banghead: :banghead: :banghead:

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Oh the stories I could tell about campfires. For instance, our new neighbors could be nominees for the TCD People of Genius (don't know if it was man or women) Award. The picked up a stump... not a a few branches, a stump, put it over as it would not go in their fire ring, then lit it. Did I mention it has been raining off and on for a week. The smoke was thicker than the fog. They then left it to go to the other side of their lot.... Genius at Work! :banghead: :banghead: :banghead:

Yikes! My sister still teases me about a camping trip we took in the 90's whence Itook what I thought was a burnable object and threw it on the fire.

It turned out to be a dead, flattened horseshoe crab.

Talk about smoke, and stinky!

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Day Four Continued:

We left off with the whole crew planning to meet back at the camper for lunch.

Today it was clean-out the fridge and cooler day.

So we heated up everything in one big pot, and spooned it out into sandwiches comprised of cheddar and provolone and a pile of miscellaneous meat (leftover bbq brisket, pork, and buffalo chicken…all mixed together!)

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Today was also a bit of the “bottom of the barrel” day.

For instance, our Sweet Baby Ray’s BBQ sauce was now gone, and we were left with this.

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Which, all things considered, was freaking amazing!

We also finished the rest of the brats, today it was Johnsonville “Stadium” Brats.

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As cooked so eloquently by Mr. Paul Jr.

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Now, it was time for another adventure!

Going all the way back to emptying out Ben’s garage, preparing the trailer… dragging all 8 1/2 bikes to the Fort.

This was the day it was all going to be worth it.

Yes Virginia, I said 8 ½ bikes.

We needed 7, but Ben located one in his forgotten stash that my son fell in love with called the “Cobra”, so he took 2, and Annie has a tag-a-long which is a half-a-bike that attaches to mine, so she had 1 ½ bikes with her.

I had spent some time prior to the trip investigating a good bike route.

One that kept us out of traffic, maybe a little shade, and somewhat scenic.

I had heard about a trail that leads to the Wilderness Lodge.

I asked about it here, and even looked at it from a satellite.

That was going to be our trail.

I’d heard this referred to as the Nature Trail.

So off we went on our way to WL via the nature trail.

As expected, Ben packed 16 waters for himself and had to steer his new bike with a fully loaded Publix bag pulling the handlebar to the right.

We headed up towards the Settlement, past the stop sign and bus loop, where I usually attract attention because of the cart, but on bikes, no one even glances at you.

A quick veer to the left, and voila, new territory!

I was comforted by the fact that the road was next to us for a bit, then it traversed the path and headed off to the group tent area, while we continued towards WL.

We stopped for a sip of water, and this sign offered a little confusion.

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We opted for the paved path towards the WL.

Next time we stopped for a swig of water, we snapped a photo of the kids moving ahead.

Notice my son has my hat on, and you’ll see that hat end up on just about everyone at some point!

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As the trail ended, it led us pretty much near the front of WL.

We pedaled on through to the bike rack, which is up by the beach, near the rental area.

We were hot, and dressed in our swim attire.

Heck of a coincidence!

If you’d read my TR’s in the past, you may recall that on prior trips, we’ve boated to WL and enjoyed their bar and complimentary towels!

They have a great pool, with a slide.

So there I was again at the bottom of the slide playing catch with my kids…ya know… catching my kids.

And of course telling the other kids that the lifeguard was yelling at them.

I had to have MetalWife teach me how to say it in Spanish.

Now I’m a jerk in two languages!

I had to pay for use of the towels by patronizing the bar…think I wouldn’t?

So I ordered some freaky tiki take a leaky ding dang Margarita of some sort.

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I love how they put the fruit on a Wilderness Lodge arrow-shaped swizzle stick.

Told you I was going to soak up the details like a dollar store sponge…which we had several of, back at the camper!

The Mrs. had some sort of Sangria with another theme-specific name.

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Ben still had 13 bottles of warm water left.

Yum.

They had a poolside DJ that was hosting some games like the old “what’s in your beach bag scavenger hunt”, she wasn’t getting a good response because she was asking for weird stuff that you wouldn’t bring to the pool!

Well I don’t!

A $100 bill.

A character autograph.

An item from another resort.

Cool. I have some of those.

Children from the Fort.

That’ll work.

I sent the kids up!

Here’s them getting lick-on tattoos.

I snapped the photo just in time for this random guy to step between me and the kids.

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They’re in front of fruity pants.

The sun was so bright, I couldn’t see the screen.

And just a brief pause to point out how unbelievably hot the pool deck was.

I dropped an ice cube and it disappeared like one of those time-elapsed films of a flower blooming.

It was time for the geyser to blow, and since I won’t be any out west any time soon, we watched.

Ben and I both took photos, so here they all are.

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His are the ones with the bluer sky. Must be the height. Rare air up there!

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We’ll wait while you make a bathroom break.

We all did…power of suggestion!

Back? Ok, let’s go!

So, back to the bike rack.

There were all our bikes, mostly old, a little rusty, ‘cept for Ben’s brand new ride.

And, one extra bike, a purple mountain bike.

And one dude, pacing back and forth, snorting and glancing nervously.

Did any of us see a bike like his, but in pink?

Someone had stolen his wife’s brand new bike.

Cut the lock and took it.

And curiously took the lock?

And left all of ours that were unlocked! The nerve!

We felt bad and told him we would look on the trail and call police if we saw anything.

The whole thing had a weird feeling.

I’m not sure I trusted him.

His bike was parked in the middle of all ours.

And, he had a Yankees tattoo.

And it wasn’t a lick-on one like the kids got at the pool.

We headed towards the bike rental area, Ben checked out the fishing…

Of which there is none!

Look, a sandy path!

Let’s follow it!

So off we all go, through the woods, along the shore line of Bay Lake.

We get to a spot in the path where we decided to go right, as left would have left us….somewhere!

We’ll try that next time!

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But for now we headed right, and before long, we were at a road, and coming back through here!

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Who knew?

Probably you, but we didn’t. So there!

Instant adventure…

So back down the paved trail from whence we came.

Annie’s teasing the kids that we’re faster.

“Cheater, you don’t have to pedal!” as she’s tagged along to my bike.

Funny thing about my bike. I bought it in 1995 to go out on a bike riding date (MetalWife wasn’t in the picture yet).

I would have never imagined that 17 years later I would be dragging my 3rd child around Disney on it!

Speaking of MetalWife. She grew up in Brooklyn. She can speak several languages, set-up a popup by herself, and breakdance, but she cannot ride a bike.

The name of the TR is Blood, Sweat, and Fiends: A Fort Fourth.

We met the fiends, established that it was hot, and experienced the Fourth!

Here’s where the blood comes in.

We were on our way back to the old Cottontail Curl.

Annie and I blazed ahead, parked, sat down, imbibed…

They’re taking awhile…

Let’s go see…

Here comes MetalWife, limping and pushing her bike back through the 1500 loop.

John 2 had gotten a bit in front of her, and she was a little panicky that he was already across the bridge and was preparing to cross the street into the loop.

He’s a pretty good rider, and watches for vehicles.

She’s so wrapped up in where he is that she wobbles, loses control, and hits the bridge.

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Needless to say, we had a lot of wound management to attend to.

BTW, it looks way better now, but you can still see it, and still a little tender.

A rambunctious 40lb. puppy hasn’t helped matters!

At this point, Ben and William decided they wanted to fish the canal that surrounds the back of the second half of our loop.

The MetalFamily planned another adventure!

Whip it! Whip it good!

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Hey, I only brought 10 bottles of water, plus the 2 DIZ cups which I conveniently refilled in the snack bar area by the pool. Unfortunately, I left half the skin from the bottoms of my feet on that pool deck on the way to the beverage station. The planked walkway by the geiser even left grill marks on the little remaining skin still clinging to to bottoms of my feet..... did someone ask, "how hot was it?"

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